The two bots are entering the arena to their signature theme songs… From the left, trundling into position 4 to the sounds of the YMCA, Hard Hat does a little spin for the cameras… And over there, at the far side of the arena, Sunrise is moving towards position 15 with The House of the Rising Sun playing over the speakers. A little on the nose, don’t you think, Jason?

I do, Sammy, I do… Well, in any case, the stadium here is at capacity and they are lapping it up, so let’s see - Oh! Just like that, they’re off!

And - ah! Oh! Ah!

Did you see that!

Jason, did you see that!

I did! Just like that, it’s over -

What a remarkable -

I don’t think I’ve seen anything like it, Sammy.

Me neither. Barely even a second.

To be honest, we shouldn’t have been surprised - again and again we see bots getting into the ring with Hard Hat, forgetting just how much shove that little Bot has.

It’s the nuclear engine, Jason .

It sure is, Sammy. But again, what happened here is, before Sunrise even had a chance to move, or to make use of the obstacles in the arena, was Hard Hat did the big chu-chu and sprinted across the arena, slammed into it, and pushed it straight out of the arena with its big Cattle Catcher.

A lot of disappointed faces in the crowd here, Jason - a lot of people hoping to see a proper match - but that’s what happens when you come in with a technically good robot but without preparing your tactics.

That’s right - and here’s the judges to make it formal - there is is. Hard Hat wins by TKO.