On 12 September the four eternally-reincarnated Gladiators of the ClingBoom arena met for the 4,816th time. Acid Yoda couldn’t get a look in, falling swiftly behind to a laser trap and an arena buzzsaw before being taken out by a slicing cheesecutter. Cheesecutter Purplebeard did slightly better, holding on to the midway mark, before being shoved into an acid pit and burning away. This left Buzzsaw Darth Cliche and Laser Mideg to scrap it out, but right at the buzzer and StickyBomb dispenser starting tossing explosives around randomly and both Gladiators were caught in the crossfire.

The result is a draw through mass extinction. We’ll scrape as much DNA as we can together to resonstitute the players before Friday’s 4,817th bout.