Friday, May 29, 2009

[Flavour] The outside

[Title sequence.]

Host
Welcome back to Reality TV! Today, I’m going to show you some of the contestant’s diary entries.

[Diary entries play]


[Outside. There is a beach; on the sea, a container ship can be seen receding into the distance, and the wreckage of a tower crane is clearly visible. A cameraman is setting up a camera.]

Hostess
I was wondering when you’d get here. I’ve been stuck here for weeks now, wondering when the show would start. And without even a cameraman to set things up!
Cameraman
Well, I’m here now. Sorry, I was busy with another programme.
Hostess
I wonder when the first contestant’s going to arrive? I’m not entirely sure I properly understand this “reverse reality TV” idea. And what a mess there is here; I don’t get why they dug that hole and dropped that container in anyway…
Cameraman
Well, I understand the idea easily enough; the contestants arrive one at a time, and I think the public have some say as to who arrives first.
Hostess
I’m not even entirely sure what the rules are!
Cameraman
Well, you’ll just have to make some up. Or ask the contestants for ideas, I suppose; that’s always fun. Also, we should be able to link up with another reality TV show, to do joint challenges and other such events. It’ll be fun!
Hostess
And you know the worst of it? I have absolutely no idea where I am!

The diary-room camera has never worked. However, when I went down to the camera run; I found a few Polaroid photos; it seems the cameraman has been resourceful about such things, or maybe he took “cameraman” rather too literally. The graphic artists back at the TV company HQ did a good job trying to get the lips to move in sync with the words, though, so hopefully nobody will notice.

Comments

Rodlen:

05-29-2009 05:07:54 UTC

Ah, that’s why sparks were coming out of the diary room camera.