Ascension Address: The Great Reorganization
Okay, folks, here’s the deal.
We’re losing money.
I know, some of you have been saying this for days. Weeks. Months, even. You guys think I just won’t listen, and that I’m going to drive this company into the ground and take you all with me.
This ends today. We’ve had a lot of hardship, and I have to be honest when I say that it’s not going to be easy. But we can prevail, and we can make our company the best it can be, and you guys can have your Christmas bonuses back, because I know you love those.
I’m proud to stand before you today to unveil the newest vision for BlogNomic, Inc., that will bring us more money that we could ever have dreamed of. We are going to be The BlogNomic Taxi Company!
This may sound just a little bit Crazy Taxi, but let me assure you that I know exactly what I’m doing. The taxis in Tubternetsville is terrible. Have you ever tried to get a cab from downtown to the airport to catch a private jet in under 5 minutes? It’s absolutely impossible! There is a real need for this sort of thing. Now, in order to be successful, we need to be as efficient as we can be. So I’m immediately reassigning the word ‘Player’ throughout the Ruleset to ‘Driver’, the word ‘Emperor’ to ‘Dispatcher’, and I’m firing every dynastic rule.
We’re going to make this city go!
