Score 5. Gotta give it up, entirely plausible and also internally logically consistent.

Score 4. It’s sound but doesn’t roll off the tongue well if you haven’t used it before

Score 2. Evocative, but most of the planet’s soil has literally been excreted by earthworms.

Having grown up in the southern United States, I can say that this rings like a true Southernism. Could easily be in the lyrics to a Johnny Cash song. Score 5.

Score 3 because it has the tone down, but it’s illogical. On one hand, kicking earthworm dung is likely to raise dirt in the process. On the other, kicking eagle nests is extraordinarily difficult in the United States because the relevant eagle species don’t nest anywhere near ground level.