After orientation a short, balding man with a mousy face and coke-bottle glasses opens the door and mumbles while gesturing for you to follow him. You follow him through a series of empty, white hallways that contain no decorations on the walls. You take a right, another right, left, right… you stop keeping track as your mind drifts.
You arrive at a door (which seems out of place given that you haven’t seen one in the last five minutes). The man smiles at you without breaking eye contact for an uncomfortable length of time and introduces himself as Steve C. He pauses for several seconds and looks around slowly as if he’s waiting for something to happen. He then hands you a large manila file folder, gestures at the door, and briskly turns the next corner without explanation.
Before you open the door you first decide to open the manila folder. Inside you find an ID badge, a lapel pin bearing the Lumon Industries logo, a chocolate mint, and a perforated single-use card sealed along one edge, to be torn open in moments of motivational crisis. The card contains the text “Emergency Affirmation” on one side.
Lawnomos: he/him
Perhaps the Board could consider vetoing No Tech Plays and Imperial Exception like the Board did with Overworked and Underappreciated?